Developing Effective Communication Skills

Effective communication skills are fundamental to success in many aspects of life.  Many jobs require strong communication skills and people with good communication skills usually enjoy better interpersonal relationships with friends and family.

Effective communication is a key interpersonal skill and learning how we can improve our communication has many benefits.

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Learn to Listen

Listening is not the same as hearing; learn to listen not only to the words being spoken but how they are being spoken and the non-verbal messages sent with them. Use the techniques of clarification and reflection to confirm what the other person has said and avoid any confusion. Try not to think about what to say next whilst listening; instead clear your mind and focus on the message being received. Your friends, colleagues and other acquaintances will appreciate good listening skills.

Be Aware of Other People's Emotions

Be sympathetic to other people's misfortunes and congratulate their positive landmarks.  To do this you need to be aware of what is going on in other people’s lives.  Make and maintain eye contact and use first names where appropriate.  Do not be afraid to ask others for their opinions as this will help to make them feel valued.Consider the emotional effect of what you are saying and communicate within the norms of behavior acceptable to the other person.

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Empathize

Empathy is trying to see things from the point-of-view of others. When communicating with others, try not to be judgmental or biased by preconceived ideas or beliefs - instead view situations and responses from the other person’s perspective.  Stay in tune with your own emotions to help enable you to understand the emotions of others. If appropriate, offer your personal viewpoint clearly and honestly to avoid confusion.  Bear in mind that some subjects might be taboo or too emotionally stressful for others to discuss.

Encourage

Offer words and actions of encouragement, as well as praise, to others. Make other people feel welcome, wanted, valued and appreciated in your communications. If you let others know that they are valued, they are much more likely to give you their best.  Try to ensure that everyone involved in an interaction or communication is included through effective body language and the use of open questions.

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Use Humor

Laughing releases endorphin that can help relieve stress and anxiety; most people like to laugh and will feel drawn to somebody who can make them laugh. Don’t be afraid to be funny or clever, but do ensure your humor is appropriate to the situation.  Use your sense of humor to break the ice, to lower barriers and gain the affection of others.  By using appropriate humor you will be perceived as more charismatic.

Treat People Equally

Always aim to communicate on an equal basis and avoid patronizing people.  Do not talk about others behind their backs and try not to develop favorites: by treating people as your equal and also equal to each other you will build trust and respect.  Check that people understand what you have said to avoid confusion and negative feelings.  Encourage open and honest feedback from the receiver to ensure your message is understood and to avoid the receiver instead feeding back what they think you want to hear.  If confidentiality is an issue, make sure its boundaries are known and ensure its maintenance.

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Thanks.